I think I’m Dumb
I don’t even like walking. It’s boring, it hurts, it’s slow. And yet I keep signing up for months of it.
After my first 3-month hike, I felt kinda done. I’d walked far, seen a lot, and wanted to sleep in a bed for consecutive nights. It took me almost 2 years to forget all the horrors of walking, and want to go back out there.
It took me almost 2 years to forget all the horrors of walking, and want to go back out there.
The second time I felt like I could have walked for longer. Coming home to my bed still felt like a present for champions though. But the urge to head back out struck after just a few months. Am I going senile? I hate walking. I hate the rain, and the food, and overheating or the freezing nights.
I just realised I probably won’t be able to hike a long trail next season, and I’m sitting here sad about it. Why though? Idiot am I? There must be something else about it that makes the suffering worth it.
So what do I like? I hate walking but I think I love hiking.
Waking up at a new place almost every day. Walking as far as I want, or as far as the water-sources lets me. Eating when I’m hungry and taking a dump in the woods when the need comes. I love the personal freedom of being out there.
I’m not spending a single brain cell thinking about bills being late, cleaning the windows or what my boss thinks about me. I think about the next hamburger in town, when I can drink water again and where to sleep.
I think I love the challenge. See how hard I can push myself, how far can I walk in one day? How fast can I walk up that hill? How many miles can I do in a week?
I think I love the culture on trail as well. Everyone is friendly, because they all understand your suffering. Getting a hitch into town right before the bar closes so you can make last call is heaven, and sitting around a campfire getting to know the other idiots out there and hearing how they suffered today is fun (even without the beers).
If I could only do the fun stuff I would never stop hiking. But maybe that’s the point? Maybe you have to earn it first.
//Lumberjack
